Dark

I am learning that in my desire to know and understand more of light, to have more light, I also have to be exposed to darkness. It is the side I did not want to see.  God did not create darkness. He created light and he gave us many forms of light - the sun, moon, the stars, His son, the light of Christ that can shine through each of us.  If it were not for the dark we would not recognize or appreciate the light as fully. It is because we have darkness that we can crave the light.

It is when we seek for light that we better see it in others. It is when we are experiencing dark that we crave the light and draw closer to our Savior. We have been feasting on these Bible videos.

As I watched this video this morning I learned that in Peter and in Jesus we have examples of dark and light.  Here is what I mean.  Peter was anxious and convinced that he was ready to follow Jesus anywhere through anything.  Jesus knew Peter had some learning to do, some refining.  Peter would experience fear, doubt, cowardliness, shame, possibly despair.  He still turned to God, sought out the light and became a light.  I think because he had been through such hard, difficult dark times he was very committed to doing all he could to stay with the light. He knew Jesus had prayed for him and believed in him. His own mistakes took him to dark but then he chose God's way. HIS way is the path that leads to happiness in this life and eternal life in the world to come.

Jesus also declared his desire to bring glory to his father. He remembers how things were before the world was. He came to earth to experience mortality. He had done all he had been asked and done it perfectly.  He also experienced a great darkness.  The darkness he experienced was not because of his own mistakes but that of others.  As he paid the price for our sins he experienced the very darkest of dark. Now he has the glory of God. Now we can say "I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me." (Phil 4:13)  He is the Light of the world.

My feeling is that we all need to experience dark. We don't all need to sin to experience difficult times. We are taught through our own choices or those of others. In my efforts to learn more of light my Heavenly Father has allowed me to experience some dark times that have been hard.  People I admire who make poor choices.  Family members who experience hard times that I can't make better. Heartache and pain in ways I never wanted to have to know, I now know about.  It is hard but I am never left alone.  Even when things feel darkest there are still stars shining and leading the way.  Even when I am down there are little tender mercies that remind me that I am not alone, that I am loved, that I can survive.  And in maintaining hope I receive a glimpse of the joy ahead and I don't have to be in that perfect place or situation to begin to feel joy again.  Hope brings joy with it.

Some of the tender mercies have been in the words of songs that repeat in my mind:
"I know who I am. I know God's plan. I follow Him in faith"
"I stand for truth and righteousness"
"As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord"
"A mighty fortress is my God"
"...but this life is the test"
"Climb every mountain, ford every stream..."

Scriptures that remind me that after the dark comes the light.  Repentance is possible. Healing is possible for the sinner, the victim, and those who love both of them.
Though they be scarlet they can be white as snow.
He will wipe away every tear.
His hand is stretched out still.
Be still and know that I am God.

I am thrilled to see the power of love.  It isn't always easy to love but Jesus helps us with that too. We can lean on him as we learn to love through the hard times. There is power in priesthood blessings. Power in a mother's prayer. Power in family, especially a family united in their desire to faithfully keep covenants and rely on the atonement of Jesus Christ.

And there is power in just keeping on.  Getting up again each day. Putting on a smile. Following through with responsibilities even when we just would rather stay in bed. Reaching out to serve when we think we have nothing left to give and finding that our sacrifice is rewarded by filling us with more than we though possible. Faith. Hope. Charity.  They each are essential to life and truly living in this world. That is how we endure. That is how we not only survive but thrive. That is how we get through the dark and can bask in the light. I will continue to seek the Light of Christ.

Its 2 weeks later and I was reading conference Ensign November 2016, Elder Evan Schmutz, He talked about sorrow

Please don't compare, but seek to learn and apply eternal principles as you wad through the furnace of your own afflictions.

--may I suggest that your personal struggles--you individual sorrows, pains, tribulations, infirmities of every kind--are all known to our Father in Heaven and to His Son. Take courage! Have faith! And believe in the promises of God! 

And then he quotes Elder Maxwell

"Certain forms of suffering, endured well, can actually be ennobling... Part of enduring well consists of being meek enough, amid our suffering to learn from our relevant experiences. Rather than simply passing through these things, they must pass through us . . . in ways which sanctify us."

I am so grateful that "We can take strength in knowing that all the hard experiences in this life are temporary; even the darkest nights turn into dawn for the faithful."